What is your relationship missing?

It’s an important question to ask sometimes, especially if you’re juggling a ton of responsibilities and feeling like nothing you do is ever enough for your kids, your partner, or yourself.

When I ask people this question, their response is usually small. They want a little more connection with their partner, or a little more ease. They want the same relationship but slightly better.

People often struggle to fully answer the question. They’ll start to share what they want, and then say, “— but I know I should be grateful. I know it could be worse. Other people have it worse.”

The truth is that you can be grateful for your relationship AND still want to make it better.

Especially if you feel like you’re barely keeping your head above water.

So to understand what’s missing in your relationship, I’ve found that it helps to flip the question around — to instead focus on, what do you dream about having more of?

This is how I ask my clients: "If you could wave a magic wand and change anything about your relationship and your life, what would that look like?"

Pause for a moment and actually answer this question for yourself.

Be as specific as you can.

Imagine what your dream relationship would look like.

And then imagine what your whole life would look like.

I love asking this “magic wand” question because I get to hear these amazing, beautiful dreams.

And what you just imagined in your mind is your dream relationship and dream life.

I’ve heard people dream of their husbands making THEM the priority. They imagine adventurous getaways to vacation homes in Mexico. They dream of their family laughing and smiling more often. And more time to make a difference in their career.

It's amazing how much we come alive when we give ourselves permission to dream.

In my work as a relationship coach, I’ve learned that your dreams can guide you to a future where you feel happier, more rested, and more fulfilled.

To learn how this process works, click here to hear my latest podcast episode on Spotify.

And if you have a moment, send me an email and tell me what your dream relationship looks like.

-Matt