A simple plan for a happy relationship

Relationships are a lot like plants.

Both tend to grow stronger over time. Each one is unique.

And taking care of them can be freaking terrifying!

I’ve met people who ABSOLUTELY REFUSE to care for a plant: “What if I kill it?” they say. Better to not get one in the first place, or give it away before it dies.

It’s scary when you don’t know what you’re doing – with plants AND relationships.

Fortunately, building a happy relationship is pretty simple.

Caring is key in relationships

According to four decades of research by the Gottman Institute, the key to a happy relationship is for you and your partner to regularly show you care about each other.

Plants need regular watering, and relationships need regular expressions of care: things like holding hands, sharing how your day went, and watching your favorite shows together.

Each act – no matter how small – strengthens your relationship by demonstrating appreciation, understanding, affection, or kindness.

Do you and your partner regularly show each other you care?

If you do, you’re already planting the seeds for a happy, long-term relationship.

Relationships don’t have to be complicated (or scary)

Sunaina and I share a lot of relationship skills, like how to create more understanding and more connection, and offer more support to your partner.

These skills are powerful ways to strengthen your relationship – but you don’t have to use ALL of them. And certainly not all the time. (Sunaina and I don’t either.)

The important thing is for you and your partner to regularly “water” your relationship with care.

So share a kiss every so often. Ask each other about stuff you’re excited about. Maybe get a plant together?

Talk with your partner about the little things you can do for each other. Keep doing them, and chances are everything else will take care of itself.

Simple, right?

To learn more ways to strengthen your relationship, subscribe to our Grow More Joy newsletter.

Matt Marquez

Relationship coaching helping people love their partners and themselves again.

http://www.growmorejoy.com
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